Autism, puberty and mood swings. 'nuf said. I think I'm afraid of these 3 words when they are in the same sentence cause I'm there right now and IT IS A REAL CHALLENGE. We don't have a lot of bad days but when we do, it's a real bad day. Today was one of those days. Yet, we managed to hang in there, from morning 'till evening. We went to church which was fine, came back home but the minute I asked him to move from one spot because I needed him to, it started. I think that was a major temper tantrum. I could see a bit of the teenage defiance in him, the way I had it when I was a teenager so yes, some of the behavior was definitely teenage-hormone-mood-swings induced but, the impulsiveness going hot then, cold then, hot again, that was autism. Cause I remember staying mad at my dad for days when I was a teen. My son threw a fit, complete with door slamming and everything (I took away his phone) but within a half hour, he was fine. A few hours later, he was back at it, this time because I told him he had to study for his test tomorrow. The difference between a neuro-typical teenager and an autistic teenager is that the neuro-typical teenager will not show his bad mood to complete strangers. My son did. I wanted all of us, my husband, my son and I to go to the Christmas concert the church has every year; it was tonight. We do this every year, you know to get into the spirit of Christmas but really, I started looking for things to do to create memories for my kid, to give him tangible experiences so he could have a better grasp on customs and traditions that surround different holidays. So we usually find things things to do around our community on those special holidays like Christmas and Independence day. Friday, we did a Light show. It was free and he really enjoyed it. He usually likes attending the concert, too but he was in too much of a mood to really get into it this time. When we walked into the church for the Christmas concert tonight and someone greeted him by name, he humphed, turned his face and did not reply. He was in such a funky mood, he could not even get himself together to say hi back and he was pretty much in that fine mood throughout the Christmas concert. Cyril had not humphed at strangers since maybe 1st or 2nd grade. So he was pretty p'ed. Yes. I did take his phone and also asked him to study but I had no idea I was declaring open season on my patience when I did. I came across this article once everything was back to normal. Here's the link: http://raisingchildren.net.au/articles/autism_spectrum_disorder_mood_changes_teenagers.html. I read it and it actually made me feel better because it made me understand what was happening to my kid during his temper tantrums, reminded me of the challenge he has trying to control his emotions because of his condition. These are the tools I need, the tools I use, the tools I turn to when I find myself at a loss or feel frustrated. I go looking for answers from the people who I think may know more, may know better, the experts, the practitioners, the researchers. Thank God for them and the work they do.
So today was hard but, those hard days are also part of parenting and if there's one thing I love more than anything, it's being this autistic teenager's mom. I'm not going to lie to you. My patience was wearing thin, like real thin tonight and I guess, like many parents dealing with the teenage years of their children, I had a headache but parenting in general is not easy. It's just not. It's a labor of love. Same goes for parents of special needs children. It's a labor of love for all of us. #truth.
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